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Marriage and God

Note: This blog is part of a upper college level course on marriage as part of a Bachelors program in Marriage and Family for the Brigham Young University - Idaho. This Bachelors is the subset to entering a Masters Program in Counseling. The information and thoughts are my own and do not represent the school or Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.















I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. in 1995 the Prophet of the Church, along with his two counselors and 12 Apostles, put forth a proclamation to the world about the family. Proclamations are rare, and are received by revelation from God. 
When it came out in 1995 I remember thinking, "Of course, we all know this is true and how it should be!" The proclamation taught that men's and women's roles and genders are given by God before this earth. That men and women are to be equal partners in their families, that they should have children and raise them in goodness and love, that women are blessed with the attributes of nurturing and their children need that nurture, that men should provide for their families, protect them, and preside ( Lead them in goodness and example). They warn that people who abuse children or spouses are accountable to God, and that the traditional family gives each child and family member its best chance through the difficulties of life by learning from one anothers differences and strengths. That if that traditional family is broken down, all of the calamities and signs that precede the second coming of Christ's birth, these will come because of the breakdown of the family - the central and most important unit to God. The family is His purpose.
Now by today's standard of traditional families are disintegrating to a different standard, I now see how prophetic the proclamation was. I never imagined the traditional family would be broken apart so much. That so may people would form their own opinion on what a family is supposed to be. Each and every part of The Proclamation is being challenged as a standard, even looked at as ancient and no longer relevant. The research we read this week especially in the "State of our Union; The National Marriage Project" opened my eyes. It showed me the underlying consequences of the breakdown of the family that I had not realized before. For instance, the economic impact on the country from divorces and welfare. The impact it has on education of single mothers trying to provide for their family on their own, or the low statistics of children from single parents that every reach college degrees. The lower economic impact on those who do not get married, have children outside of marriage, and those who only live together. The suffering of children from the instability of cohabitation and single parenting. The breakdown of the traditional family and of marriage is costing us as taxpayers billions of dollars, not to mention the fabric of the integrity of a nation, unity, and morality.
My husband and I were foster parents for a time. As I read the impact of children growing up without stable parents in a solid marriage, I could check every effect off. I saw more abuse in the children who's mothers lived with partner after partner. They each were in a lower class and suffered the effects of malnutrition and lower education. They had been in and out of schools, had lower grades, suffered from low self esteem. Some times it seemed like all was lost. How could they rise out of that situation? How could they hope for their future, or even see what a better future looked like? The teens we fostered believed that the life they lived was all there would ever be to life. It was a blessing to show each child that they were incredible people, capable of innovation, creativity, critical thinking, hopes and dreams. That they could break the chain and start something new.
This week we read an article from a man named an author, psychologist, and family therapist. Carlfred Broderick spoke on transitional characters. How God has placed strong children in the midst of a abusive and difficult family,  to rise out of the chaos of their living environment, and start a new generation that can be born in strength of goodness and integrity. To help future generations in that family. It made me want to rise up and look for them, to help them be successful and feel loved.
The most interesting parts of this course have been the research statistics on what the breakdown of the traditional family is doing to our country, and even the world. I will continue to share these as the course continues.
"The Family: A Proclamation to the world" September 23, 1995 https://www.lds.org/topics/family-proclamation?lang=eng&old=true
State of our Union; The National marriage project 2012 

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